Some exciting things not directly having to do with me and my opinions happened yesterday! I can't talk about it yet, but I will, and I will probably abuse the exclamation point! But right now I would like to complain about planning a wedding. An ad on my workday Pandora station pitches expensive diamond engagement rings by saying "this is the most romantic time of your life". What? What does that mean?, I ask no one as I mute my office PC and get up to refill my mug of the bitter, caffeinated swill they stock at work.
I am excited to get married, but like I said before we got engaged, a fiancee is just a girlfriend with an unpaid internship. A lot of responsibility, and I'm not really officially on staff. I have been avoiding dress-shopping because it's not (very) time-sensitive and maybe I'm slightly padded from the winter/beer. But I know I want a simple, not-strapless, not-poufy dress that won't look busy when hanging out with an oversized necklace (my signature) and the bright, good-sized tattoo under my right clavicle. And I found one that I really love, that happens to be double my arbitrarily set (and culturally small) dress budget.
Me: I found the perfect dreeeessssssss but it is more money than I have ever spent on something that wasn't a plane ticket.
People in earshot: Well how much is it?
People in earshot: Oh shut up. Just buy it.
I hear you guys. Maybe I'll just sack up and buy it. But if Nick and I can't afford to honeymoon in bungalows in an Ecuadorian CLOUD FOREST, it's on you. Also, CLOUD FOREST was totally coined by a marketer right? It's brilliant. What sort of monster is not charmed by the idea of a cloud forest? It sounds like a Raffi song.