Tuesday, May 31, 2011
"It will never be the right time" or "I'll sleep when I'm dead"
Sjanneke got married in July 2009, the summer after a year we both spent scaling the brick streets of Athens, Ohio (always uphill, never down). The year preceding her wedding, she was a full-time teacher, a full-time graduate student, and planning a wedding in a different city. To her now-husband, who was living in another, different city. Oh, and that spring they bought a house? I used to get stressed by proxy just trying to get mental purchase on all of it. It stressed me out so much I spent most of that winter in bed. Ha.
She was always sunny and pleasant, though frazzled. I remember that school year thinking. Wait up, babe. Hold on a minute. One thing at a time. Why are you doing this to yourself?
But here I am. Trying to finish my Master's degree, do the job I'm paid to do in addition to the jobs of two people who have left the company in the last few months, and plan a wedding. Nick is a full-time student, teaching assistant, part-time home inspector and college debate coach.
There is no one thing at a time. Stressors and obligations don't politely form a queue to be dispensed to you when you're able to handle them. It's always something, and usually, it's everything.
Lest you think I am submitting my application for martyr of the year, I'll say this - there are worse things than a steady paycheck, marrying your best friend, being close to a graduate degree earned debt-free. But you guys. I am so tired.