Friday, October 7, 2011

Nick and I got married two weeks ago and here are some things that I know now:
1. The stars are brighter in the southern hemisphere.
2. Some great new Australian (or generally antipodean or English?) slang. (dero - derelict. nanner - a nap taken in the afternoon, as one's nana is wont to do. sus - suspicious, suspect.)
3. Insufferable rich people are the same everywhere.
4. Someone you know better than your childhood home can still surprise you, sometimes once an hour if you watch for it. Even someone famously staid*.
5. I have always thought, not in saturated pictures or gauzy films, but in unbearably purple sentences. Since childhood I have been involuntarily smothering every bite of breakfast, every pause before bad news delivered, in fucking WORDS. As though the world is only real after it's been extruded through my language die, an inky horse pill of English to swallow. Sometimes I manage to prune my condition into something I don't mind the world knowing and then I post it here. All of this to say that my normal brutish typewritering over perfectly nice real-time events is just not happening with our wedding. For the first time (ever?) I just don't have much to say other than thanks and yes and everything.

*Local divey diner, 2007. Waitress pauses thoughtfully after we give our order. Nick: Everything okay? Waitress: Yeah, yeah, of course. I am just trying to decide whether it's funnier to call you PredictaNick or PreNicktable.)


  1. Many congrats! Sometimes words just aren't necessary.

  2. Mazel tov!! I hear you on the lack of wedding words. I also feel like I have Nothing To Say, which is a very weird thing for me. I'm liking it though

  3. This is the best, funniest bit of real-romance writing I've read in so, SO long. LOVE it.

  4. Doh. Meant to comment on your latest post! But this is good too... ;)