Toasting with Ana the night we moved in1. Your friend posts a picture on Twitter of the house she and her husband bid on, but didn't ultimately get. It is, not to rub salt in the wound, an objectively great-looking house.
2. Remember the discussion you had with your dad over Christmas where he was like so are you guys gonna buy a house and you took a meaningful pull from your winter ale and confidently explained to him how your generation has a different approach to home ownership than his and that it is not necessarily the means to long-term wealth that it used to be and how your dad was like okay spaz patrol that's fine I was just curious and you were like oh ha ha okay.
3. Think "cute houses are cuuuute".
4. Realize you have not been dutifully whisking money into savings each month for years for your health.
5. Some data drives at work fail and so you spend the intervening hour until they are repaired clicking around real estate sites and finding tiny 900 sq. ft. postwar brick houses in leafy neighborhoods that are a little sleepy but you know what, as fun and as "with it" as you think you are, you are a pretty sleepy person. Literally, your ideal state is asleep.
6. Text your husband from work. "Shoooould weeee try to buy a house?"
7. Remind yourself that you deeply love your apartment despite its one measly closet for storage, lack of air conditioning, the suspicious smell of rotting organic matter that pervades one very specific corner of the foyer after it rains, and the sizeable cracks in the plaster of the ceiling directly over your bed, into which you gaze every night during your bedtime ritual of calculating the likelihood of your imminent death by crushing. Nay, you love your apartment not in spite of, but maybe even because of these things.
8. Remind yourself that when Nick finishes school in a few years, you will move away from Columbus. And that houses can be sold, sure, but rentals, you can just stroll out the door and disappear.
9. Spend an afternoon standing at a booth at an outdoor festival for work. Then play a show with an impromptu band, then dance in your cheap boots for hours and hours while the other bands play, certain that your actual heel bone has become exposed and is slamming into the plastic sole of said ankle boots over and over again, but you cannot investigate properly as it is very dark in the bar, and you are very lit.
10. Arrive home at 2 a.m. after making a quick stop at the 24 hour donut shop on campus, having selected an old-fashioned plain cake donut and glazed blueberry cake donut for yourself.
11. Fall sideways across the loveseat with a donut in one hand, having used the other hand to unzip the offending boots. Kick them from your tortured feet. Announce "we are home; this is where we live" to your husband.
12. "This is where we live" he confirms.